I had the honor of being a pin up momma with my son Harrison for the May 2018 Pin Up Life Magazine. I had to answer interview questions about how pin up and vintage lifestyle affected my parenting. It was these very questions that got me thinking about how hard life can be today as a modern mum. Don’t get me wrong back in the 40’s and 50’s, the women did not have it easy. They were completely repressed and dependent upon their husbands.
Many of us have heard the African proverb “It takes a village to raise a child.” Today we have so much freedom yet it seems open up a pandoras box of what a successful mother should be. This freedom can sometimes feel like social pressure that we must fulfill in all the spectrums of life for instance. Today a woman is expected to have a successful career, be a good home maker, make sure they meet all their child’s needs and beyond, little alone lets throw into the mix of the fact that you are meant to look like a swimsuit model 6 weeks postpartum. How can we possibly be wonder woman in every facet of our lives? It’s like you are setting yourself up for failure. With all of these pressures it couldn’t be more true that it takes a whole village to raise a child.
Harrison turned one on mothers day and I think I am only just starting to find my feet as to where my role is as a parent, wife, and entreprenuer. For the first eight months I had so much guilt over not earning the same wage I once did when I was working full time as a marketing professional. A wise friend told me that there is value in all the things a mother and home maker does. For instance how much would it cost you to have your house cleaned, full time child care and pay for prepared meals every day. Expensive right!?! This really changed my point of view, my part time income didn’t seem so irrelevant.
More importantly lets think about the many people influence the development of a child as they grow to adulthood: family members, friends, teachers, and others. Key people also influence the parents which can in turn influence how you parent your child. Regardless of the many social pressures women face today the most critical influencer to your child’s development is from the mother.
If you stop to think for a moment to really think about the fact that your one of the most important factors to your child’s future, success and happiness in life. There is no price that can ever be placed upon this.
So what are a few things that you can do to rear good relationships with your family and create stronger bonds?
1. Family night. Reserve one night a week that is dedicated to your family. We usually dedicate Monday nights to our family home evening. The aim is to spend quality time together. Harrison is so young and we are both learning to be parents but we like to do small activities like playing ball or going for a swim because its always warm here in Florida! Once he is a little bit bigger we are really looking forward to going to mini put put. All families are different and enjoy different activities the point is to laugh, play, read scriptures, and discuss items that matter to one another. Use this time to bond and create lasting memories. I have great memories as a child drawing silly pictures with my Dad.
2. Eat dinner together. Studies show that sharing a family meal together strengthens family bonds, creates well adjusted children, and reduces obesity. I know this can be hard because life gets busy especially if you have two working parents. You can always put together no fuss crock pot meals. I do love them as they cook themselves or do a big fry up over the weekend and freeze your meals. Then you can come home heat them up and you have healthy home cooked food for you and your family.
Use your meal times together to find out more about each others’ daily activities, and show support and encouragement for one another. Restrict phones and electronic devices (which is hard for me!!!). Be present with each other. I love to have my family dinners outside on the balcony. There is something about the fresh air and lack of electronic frequencies bouncing around that allows me to focus and be more present in the moment.
I would love to hear about your transitional experience and family activities. Drop what you love to do to create memories in the comment box below!
P.S I absolutely loved dressing up in these clothes, I felt like such a lady. I picked a few favorites for those of you who want to be a vintage inspired momma!
Love Vanessa xoxox
Big thanks to shadow rose photography for taking these photos. xx